What do you mean, you haven't filed your tax return?

Yes, it's that time of year once again, when thousands of people around the country suddenly realise, "Oh dear (or something similar), I've forgotten to deal with my tax return. I'd better get it done.".

Only this year, there's a difference. In years past, you could download the return form, fill it out quickly, and deliver it by hand. I remember when self assessment was new, my then office opened over the weekend to deal with the late rush. Taxpayers were queuing down a flight of stairs to hand over their return and a cheque to settle their liabilities. As the office's Customer Service Manager, my job was to keep things moving along and deal with those who felt that queuing was beneath them. It turned out that they were wrong...

Unfortunately, such an option isn't open to you this year, as the deadline for filing paper returns was 31 October. Your only option is to file online, although you'll need an activation code if you haven't already got one. Oh yes, and it's almost certainly too late to get one in time.

So, a penalty of £100 beckons, unless you take my advice. In fact, the penalty is £100 or the amount of tax unpaid at 31 January so, if you make sure that you pay your tax in time, and I recommend today, any penalty will be reduced to nil once the tax return is filed.

You know what to do. Besides, the Government needs your money...