The day the Morris Men came to Needham Market

Having lived in a big city for many a year, and having spent all my money on whisky and beer (I like whisky but I'm not so fussed about it), my experience of morris dancing is, to be honest, a bit metropolitan. It's all very well, but just rather bucolic, and that word is used in an ironic sense in this instance.

However, live in the country long enough (and I mean live in it rather than just visiting it at weekends), and you begin to appreciate it rather better. It isn't simply a bunch of men with beards who drink beer, wear hats with flowers on and either wave hankies or hit sticks against each other. And yes, I acknowledge that beer is drunk (real ale, not the gassy lager stuff), and that straw hats with flowers on are de rigeur, but it is quite complex.

As a child at primary school, I was forced to do country dancing every week. Given that I went to school in a north-west London suburb, that was a little unusual but, as one got the hang of it, one began to develop an appreciation of the precision needed to do it well. Oh yes, you can galumph about, flinging your partners around, but the real joy of it is remembering all of the patterns, making sure that your timing is spot on, and ensuring that your partner enjoys the experience as much as you do.

Now, add sticks to that, and you have to be even more accurate. Those sticks hurt if you miss your target, and the clatter when they are struck against each other sounds all wrong if your timing is out. And if you do hit one of your colleagues, the beer only deadens the pain for a while.

So, when I discovered, on arrival at the fundraising launch for St John the Baptist Church, that there would be beer, some really excellent sausage rolls and morris dancing, I was rather pleased. Eight men, two accordion players, two lengths of stick - what more could you want? And, I have to say, the East Suffolk Morris Men were excellent value, giving us a goodly sample of dances under the splendid fifteenth century roof. And, in keeping with tradition, a number of them could be seen sampling the fine products of the local Calvors brewery.

In tribute to them, here they are, performing at the Suffolk Show last month...